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How Fleas Began

Some say that fleas were created long ago
Just before any books were written
So the story goes

By a god with his own creativity smitten
Went off on a monk, made plants, animals, grubs
And fleas, those blood sucking bugs.

He made butterflies eaten by birds
And flowers, picked by boys
Given shyly to girls
The truth is a much different vision
Than any work of science or fiction,
As a host of versions have passed through ages
By teaching children to learn tracts of diction
And some of the stories were too rude to mention
Or spoken by prophets of doom and religion
For when the tale was recorded the story was already distorted
Though there are still elemental rhymes from three wizened dead wise sages
But the first tellers of tales are not always believed
As they wrote those rhymes when they needed something more to eat

The first fleas were made over time
With spare parts
Not up to grade, of the production line
Nano-cogs that were twisted
Scales bent, atomic bolts mis-thread
Paintwork scratched and blistered.

Tiny robots cross-wired
With micro-saws for teeth
Springs on their legs that at the slightest twitch misfired
When they never had any intention to leap

Jumping around they didn't know what to eat
One of them landed on their maker's godly feet
And half up his leg the robot flea started to drool

So in a space between two hairs,
With his teeth, the flea made a tentative tear
Then after sawing a hole through the skin,
He feasted on the juices within
And was bloated by the blood red and rare

And lying back without a care...

Using the radio under his helmet spoke with a satisfied drawl
Calling fleas one and all
Check out the mouthparts installed
If you don't mind sharing blood vessels,
I'm testing mine once more on this here giant testicle

As soon as they'd had a bite and feast, all the fleas did agree
If they would make their way out there
This was their most tasty opportunity.

So long, long ago, far, far away in the outer reaches of the Universe
God expelled the first fleas for biting him where it hurts.